Don't Close Your Eyes
by TBorah89
Summary: Teddy knows that he isn't the man Rayna sees when she closes her eyes and dreams at night. He can see the situation for what it is and he comes up with a plan he hopes will finally help her get over her unresolved feelings for Deacon. Will it work out the way he wants it to or will it backfire on him?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is just a short little story based on how things could have gone when Maddie was little. As usual I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 1

_I know you loved him, a long time ago  
Even now in my arms, you still want him I know  
But darling this time, your memories die  
When you hold me tonight, don't close your eyes_

Teddy stood on the side of the stage watching the show go on in front of him. It wasn't the first time he had seen her on stage. It wasn't even the first time he'd seen her on the stage with him. It was the first time that he'd really let himself acknowledge the undeniable chemistry between his wife and the man who place he'd taken in her life.

He normally didn't let himself think about Deacon Claybourne and the hurt and pain he'd caused Rayna. Most days he did his best to forget that Rayna had spent their first year of marriage crying herself to sleep because Teddy wasn't Deacon. He forgot that she would much rather have Deacon's ring on her finger. He knew about the shabby little engagement ring Deacon had given her and she kept hidden in her jewelry box. He also let himself forget that the two-year-old little girl who called him daddy wasn't really his. She was just another woman that he'd taken Deacon's place in her life.

Tonight, he couldn't ignore things that way that he normally could. Since Rayna had brought Deacon back to her band, he'd been coming up with excuses not to make it to any of her shows. It had been a continuous point in their marriage, but she had insisted she needed to do it to be able to live with herself and what she'd taken from him without him knowing. Teddy had gone along with it, but he had made her swear that she would never tell Deacon the truth about Maddie and he had stopped going to her shows. It was the only way he could live with the situation.

He saw the very reason way he'd stayed away playing out on stage before him right now. It was clear that even though his ring was the one on Rayna's finger, on that stage she belonged to Deacon. Hell, that was evident off stage too if someone knew how to look for it. Teddy knew, he knew all the signs and the subtle little gestures that told him his marriage was on borrowed time.

_Don't close your eyes, let it be me  
Don't pretend it's him, in some fantasy  
Darling just once, let yesterday go  
And you'll find more love than you'll ever know  
Just hold me tight, when you love me tonight  
And don't close your eyes_

Every time she kissed him, or hugged them, or every time they danced together, and most importantly every time they made love he could tell that her heart just wasn't into it. She'd never let herself react to him the way she was reacting to Deacon right now. They were face to face on the stage sharing a mic and staring into each other's eyes. The electricity that was still between them was barely contained. The sad fact was even when they were being intimate with each other Rayna never looked him in the eyes like that. She kept her eyes closed and it never seemed like she was in the moment with him. It always felt like she was a million miles and three years away from the moment they were in.

Teddy shook his head in disgust as the song turned to one of their older ones. One of the ones they had written while they were still together. He would have said while they were still in love, but he was getting hit in the face with the fact they were indeed still in love and the vows she'd taken with him didn't change that.

_Maybe I've, been a fool, holding on all this time  
Lying here in your arms, knowing he's in your mind  
But I keep hoping someday, that you'll see the light  
Let it be tonight and don't close your eye_

The only time when he felt like she was halfway in the moment is when they did things as a family with Maddie. And then there were still times when Rayna would have a faraway look on her face like she was imaging doing whatever it was they were doing with Deacon and Maddie. He wasn't so stupid that he didn't know he should walk away and let them be instead of holding on so tightly and keeping Rayna in a situation that she really didn't want to be in. That's why he was here tonight.

_Don't close your eyes, let it be me  
Don't pretend it's him, in some fantasy  
Darling just once, let yesterday go  
And you'll find more love than you'll ever know  
Just hold me tight, when you love me tonight  
And don't close your eyes_

After a year of ignoring the situation and hoping it would go away he was finally going to do something about it. It wasn't fair to anyone in that situation to keep living on pins and needles. He would always be afraid that Rayna was one moment of weakness away not only from letting Deacon back into her bed, but also telling him that Maddie was his daughter. He couldn't live like that anymore and he didn't plan to. It was time to settle this situation once and for all before someone got really hurt.

_Don't close your eyes, let it be me  
Don't pretend it's him, in some fantasy  
Darling just once, let yesterday go  
And you'll find more love than you'll ever know  
Just hold me tight, when you love me tonight  
And don't close your eyes_

_Just hold me tight, when you love me tonight,  
And don't close your eyes_

He was going to break the promise that he'd asked Rayna to keep and hope for the best from there. He couldn't keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. If things worked out the way he hoped they would this would prove that he was indeed the better man for her.

He didn't bother to stick around for the rest of the set. He only had one objective in mind and if he saw his wife before he completed it, there was a good chance that he wouldn't go through with it. This needed to come out in the open and it needed to come out now.

* * *

Deacon had his shirt off and thrown on the floor before he closed the dressing room door behind him. Two hours under those spotlights and he was drenched in sweat as usual. He grabbed a bottle of water out of the cooler and twisted the top off. He drank from it deeply before he sat it on the counter. That didn't quench his thirst quite the way a could beer would, but those days were behind him.

A lot of things were behind him now. Part of him didn't know why he bothered to stay sober, he'd already lost everyone and everything that mattered to him. There was no reason for him not to drink as much as he wanted.

Before he could get too lost in his thoughts there was a knock on the dressing room door. He put on a clean shirt before he opened it with a smile on his face. "There she is my date for the night."

"Here she is. You have her for a couple hours while I take care of business like always." Rayna put her daughter in his arms. She didn't really need him to watch her, but it was a thing she did to give him time with the daughter he didn't know was his.

Deacon kissed the top of Maddie's head and breathed in deeply to savor her scent. There she was the reason that he didn't take a drink. He didn't want to let Rayna's little girl down the way he'd let her down so many times. "Hi, Miss Maddie, we will have a snack and then read one of those books you love so much."

"Dee," Maddie squealed happily.

Rayna put the diaper bag down on the couch. "Thanks for doing this. I know that Maddie enjoys your time together almost as much as you do."

He blushed and smiled boyishly. "Well, I really do enjoy spendin' time with this little lady. She's good practice for me. Maybe I'll be lucky enough to have one of my own someday."

She looked away from him. When he said things like that it made it harder and harder not to tell him the truth about Maddie's paternity. "You're gonna be a great daddy I can tell from the way you are with her." Her words were laden with guilt. She owed him better than this. He'd proven that he could stay sober and he was great with Maddie. She had no right to honor the promise she had made Teddy and keep him in the dark.

"I hope so." He laid a sweet kiss on Maddie's cheek.

"I know so. And who knows it might happen for you sooner than you think. Listen I know that we always do room service together after I get done with the boring work stuff. I thought we could talk 'bout some stuff tonight." She made up her mind. She was going to tell him about Maddie. The way she was living wasn't fair to anyone. She felt herself growing unhappier with each passing day.

"Sure, I'd love that." Deacon smiled. "Hold that thought, I'm a popular guy tonight." He opened the door after he heard another knock. His smile turned to a frown when he saw who it was.

"Deacon, are you gonna let me come in or make me stand out here?" Teddy asked.

"Come on in," Deacon fought the urge to roll his eyes.

"Teddy, what are you doing here?" Rayna glared at him. This was out of bounds and her husband knew that.

"I wanted to talk to Deacon. I didn't know that you and Maddie would be in here. I'm not really surprised though." Teddy retorted.

"We ain't got a damn thing to talk 'bout the last time I checked." Deacon replied.

"We do we need to talk about Maddie." Teddy informed him.

"Teddy, that is enough. Go wait for me out in the hall now." Rayna banished him from the room.

"What is he talkin' 'bout, Ray?" Deacon looked confused.

"Deacon, I've got to talk to you after I get done doin' my press stuff tonight. And it's 'bout Maddie, but it's nothing to worry about." Rayna assured him.

"With Teddy involved I figure it can't be too good. He's probably gonna want me to stay away from his daughter." Deacon rolled his eyes.

"He doesn't really get much of a say there she's my daughter too and she clearly adores you." Rayna smiled at him reassuringly.

"I adore her and her momma." Deacon smiled back.

"I'll meet you at your hotel room as soon as I'm done." Rayna took his hand and squeezed it. He was in a good place and she hoped like hell that she didn't do anything to mess that up once she told him the truth.

Teddy was waiting for her out in the hallway when she finally walked out of Deacon's dressing room. "You just leave Maddie alone with him?"

"You don't get to question me with what you just burst in there carrying on about." Rayna put her hands on her hips and stared him down.

"Look, I'm sick and tired of sitting alone at home waiting for the other shoe to drop. I want this all in the open so I can stop worrying that today is gonna be the day that someone comes in and takes her from me." Teddy wasn't telling the complete truth. He was hoping that when the stuff with Maddie came out in the open that Rayna was still going to choose to be married to him and have him act as her father. He wanted her to want him the way she wanted Deacon.

"You can't be the one to tell him. There's a very good chance that he will kill you. I have to be the one to tell him. After what I did to him he deserves to hear it from me. There's a lot of things that need to be sorted out, but that can't happen if I throw you in his face." Rayna warned him.

"Whatever you say." Teddy shrugged his shoulders.

* * *

Deacon was propped up against the headboard of his bed. Maddie laid across his chest while he played guitar for her. It was both their favorite thing to do in the world. "That's it, Miss Maddie, you let go and go to sleep for Uncle Deacon." It never failed that his guitar playing put her to sleep when it got to be that time of night.

"Your momma says that she has somethin' that she wants to talk to me 'bout regardin' you, but it ain't bad. I don't know if I believe that or not. I don't know what I would do if she stopped our nightly visits together. I love you just 'bout as much as I've always loved her." He had a habit of pouring his heart out to the little girl every time they were alone together. She knew all about his relationship with Rayna even though she wasn't old enough to comprehend most of what he was saying.

Maddie looked up at him with her big bright eyes and just stared at his face. Then her eyelids started to droop again.

She had just fallen asleep and Deacon had tucked her into his bed when Rayna walked in without bothering to knock.

"I see your lucky streak with her continues." Rayna kept her voice low.

"You ain't gotta whisper she sleeps just like you. I can make all the noise I want and she stays asleep." Deacon replied.

She took his hand and led him to the sitting area of the suite he was staying in. She sat him in a chair and she sat on the footstool in front of him. She put her hands on his knees and stared him the eyes. "Deacon, I gotta tell you something and I don't know how else to tell you, so I'm just gonna say it. Maddie is your daughter not Teddy's. Everyone who needed to know, but you knew. I had to tell you I couldn't live like this anymore."

Deacon's face turned to stone. His eyes turned cold. "I'm glad that I'm the last to know that I'm a father. I don't know how you could do this to me, Ray. I get that I was a mess, but I shoulda known before now."

"You're right I should have told you. I see you didn't ask how it was possible." Rayna mused.

"I woke up one mornin' at the cabin and it smelled like your perfume. I thought it was just wishful thinkin' on my part now I know that's not true. You were there and we were together. We made a baby that night." Deacon nodded his head stoically.

"Deacon, talk to me you have to say somethin' 'bout how you're feelin'. Maddie needs her daddy to be sober you can't hold it all inside." Rayna pleaded with him. She was so afraid that he was going to fall off the wagon because of this.

"I can't tell you how I really feel or express it the way I want to 'cause my daughter is sleepin' in the other room right now. You don't get to use Maddie against me that way ever. I'm her daddy and I don't get cut out of her life ever again for any reason." He folded his arms over his chest stubbornly. It was everything that he could do not to let his temper get the better of him.

"I was gonna ask what you wanted to do, but that kinda tells me. Do you wanna be involved and be co-parents or do you wanna keep things the way they are now. Maddie already has a daddy who doesn't mind being her daddy." She broached the subject carefully.

Deacon whirled around and fixed her with a hate filled gaze. "She has one daddy not two. I'm her daddy and I'm never to be in the dark when it comes to her again. She's already asleep and I ain't got it in me to fight in front of her, so I want her to stay with me tonight. I ain't askin' either."

Rayna didn't shrink back from his gaze she looked back at him defiantly to show him she wasn't afraid of him. "I have to go have it out with Teddy. It'll be better for her to be here with you where I know she isn't gonna hear somethin' she shouldn't hear."

He ran his hands over his face and sighed loudly. "Make no mistake 'bout it Maddie is mine and you're still mine. I may be pissed the fuck off at you right now, but one day soon I will have you in my arms and in my bed again." His deep baritone was pure smoky sex when he spoke.

"I'm married," She said before she excused herself for the night. She felt Deacon's words right between her legs. She had always and would always come undone at just the sound of his voice. Especially when he was talking about getting her into his bed again.

He smirked and licked his lips as he watched her walk away. He was hearted by the fact she'd only said that she was married and not that she was in love with Teddy. He shouldn't even be thinking about such things right now, because he had to go through a crash course in being a father. He didn't need to worry about winning back the heart of the woman who had just ripped his out all over again.

He went and stood in the doorway of the bedroom. He just wanted to watch his daughter sleep for a little while. Despite the way he was feeling he smiled when he saw Maddie sleeping with her hands behind her head. He'd seen her sleep like that before, but now he knew that she got it from him.

"Miss Maddie, I got no clue what I'm doin', but I promise you that I ain't ever gonna be to you what my old man was to me. You're already my world and the only thing in this world I love more than I love your momma. Your daddy is always gonna protect you and be there for you. I ain't perfect, I know that. And don't tell your momma I said this, but she did right by not lettin' my drunk ass 'round you. She wanted to protect you too. I'm just mad at her for lyin' to me. She was the one person in my life who wasn't supposed to hurt me the way she did. I guess we are even though, I'm sure she felt the same way 'bout me.'

This was his new addiction. Watching his daughter sleep and pouring his heart out to her. It was better than any high or drunk he'd ever been on.

* * *

Teddy was sitting up drinking a glass of scotch when Rayna came back to her room. "Where's Maddie?"

"Maddie, is with her daddy." Rayna gave him a measured reply. She didn't know why he had blown their lives apart like this and she didn't know that she could understand even if she did know.

"I'm her daddy." He spoke through gritted teeth.

"If you wanted things to stay the way they were then you shouldn't have come here tonight and forced my hand in the matter." She spit back at him hatefully.

"I told you that I was tired of living every day waiting for the bottom to drop out. With what I know about Claybourne I figured he'd just do whatever you told him to given the situation." He shrugged.

"He's not gonna do that and I'm not gonna ask him too. I didn't tell him about her to keep him out of her life. He knows and now that dynamic has to change. Not telling him about her never felt right to me. I couldn't live that way anymore either." She sighed loudly.

"You left her with him without asking me if it was ok." He fumed.

"I don't have to ask your permission to leave my daughter anywhere, Teddy. I left her with her father. If you've ever seen those two together then you'd know that she's not in any danger from him. He doted on her before he knew she was his." She poured herself a drink.

Teddy stood up and started pacing anxiously. So far this wasn't going how he'd planned it out. "What does this mean for us?"

"I don't know," Rayna took a sip of her drink. "I just know that I owe it to that little girl to make sure her world doesn't totally fall apart. Every decision I've made since I've found out about her has been for her. What I want goes on the back burner until I know she's gonna be ok."

"Is that all I am to you? A guy who was your safe place to land when you didn't want to be a single mother in the country music business?" He couldn't believe what she'd just said. Well he could, it just felt like his heart had been ripped out to hear her say it.

"I didn't say that, Teddy. You can't go around putting words in my mouth. All I said is I don't know what this means for us." She rubbed her temples.

He sat his drink down and went to walk out the door. "I see how it is then."

"Oh no, you came here and decided we needed to make this mess. You are gonna stay and help me clean it up." She put her foot down.

He turned around with a sigh. "What's the point, Rayna? I don't wanna do this with you if it's only gonna delay the inevitable."

"We don't know what's gonna happen, Teddy. The only thing that matters right now is making sure that Maddie is well-adjusted and taken care of. What you want and what I want goes out the window until she's ok." She repeated.

"Whatever you want." He shook his head in resignation.

* * *

The next morning Rayna used the key she had to Deacon's suite to let herself in. She was going to make her presence known when she heard voices coming from the bedroom. She stood in the doorway and made sure to keep herself hidden.

Deacon was laying in bed next to Maddie. He pulled the covers up over her head. "Where's Maddie?" He pulled the covers off quickly. "There she is." He smiled and his heart was about to burst from joy. "Now you do me. I'll show you how." He covered up his face. "Where's Uncle Deacon?" He pulled the cover down. He would have said daddy, but he didn't want to confuse her. "There he is," He made a funny face and she giggled. "Now you try." He covered his face back up.

Rayna couldn't help herself she had to get in on the game. "Maddie, where's your daddy?" She pulled the cover off Deacon's head. "There's daddy, get him." She sat her on Deacon's chest. It felt so freeing for her to be able to say that. "If you're serious 'bout bein' in her life you have to refer to yourself as daddy, so she knows who you are." She laid on the bed on the other side of him. She even talked different around him than when she was with Teddy.

Deacon picked Maddie up and made her fly like an airplane. "I think daddy got Maddie not the other way around." He kissed both her cheeks and made her laugh again. "Of course, I'm serious, Ray. This is my baby girl and I don't wanna miss another minute with her. I was serious 'bout what I said last night. You're still mine too and I ain't gonna rest 'til I put our family back together." He stared into her eyes meaningfully.

Rayna reached over and cupped his cheek. She let herself get lost in his eyes. It would be nothing for her to close the gap between them and kiss him. She pulled away slightly. "I'm glad to hear you talk that way. About Maddie I mean. Anythin' else doesn't matter right now. The only thing that matters is her." It killed her to say those words.

He reached over and took her hand. "I understand, Ray. You just you gotta let me be her daddy."

She put her free hand on top of his on Maddie's back. "I will fight to my last breath to make sure you two can always see each other."

He nodded his head. "I want her to have my last name and I want to be on her birth certificate. Now that I know 'bout her I don't want any other man on the record as her father. And I want her to have my last name. I ain't willin' to budge on either of those points. I wanna handle this between us. I don't wanna bring a lawyer into this, but I will if I have to." He wasn't being unkind he was just being a father.

"I will make that happen and you won't get any trouble out of me. We can work this out between us. There's no need to drag a judge or lawyers into this." She agreed. Her heart swelled this was what she had wanted since the minute she found out she was pregnant with Maddie.

"This next one is very important to me. I am her father and the only man she needs to be callin' daddy. That's my title no one else gets to take that from me." He gave her hand a gentle squeeze as he spoke. He was furious with her, but he didn't want to fight with her at least not in front of Maddie.

Rayna kissed his forehead. "Of course, Deacon, I understand. In your shoes I would feel the same way. I will make that happen for you too. Is it ok with you if I take her for a little while?"

"I ordered us some breakfast a little while ago and I was hopin' that me and her could spend the mornin' together. I just ain't got it in me to deal with Teddy. I'm gonna knock his head off if I gotta be 'round him 'fore I get ahold of this anger." Deacon retorted.

"Ok, I will be back to get her later and then later on the bus you and I need to talk." She replied.

"Sure, we will talk later." He agreed. He would do whatever he had to do to keep his little girl in his life.

* * *

A/N: This was just something that popped into my head that I wanted to get out. I can either leave it as a little one shot or add more chapters. Let me know what you guys wants. Until next time please review.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thanks to all my reviewers.

* * *

Chapter 2

It didn't surprise Deacon in the least little bit that Rayna was running behind schedule and she'd asked him to bring Maddie by her room, so she could get her ready to get on the bus later. Another part of him was a little more suspicious of her motives. If she thought she was going to get him to play nice with Teddy she had another thing coming to her. He'd hated him even before he found out that Maddie was his and now that he knew that hatred had only intensified.

He gathered up Maddie and her things before walking down to Rayna's room. He knocked on the door rather than using the key he gave her. He didn't want to just barge in if Teddy was inside. Much to his dismay Teddy was the one who answered the door. He clenched his jaw tightly to keep him from saying things that he couldn't take back.

"Dada!" Maddie squealed loudly and reached for him.

Teddy took her into his arms and kissed her cheek. "Hey, baby girl, daddy missed you last night."

Deacon glared daggers at him. He didn't know where the hell he got off acting like his little girl belonged to him. Like he had more of a right to her than he did. "Rayna, asked me to bring her by. I did that and I guess I'll be goin' now." He extended the diaper bag to him.

Teddy took the diaper bag. "You should come on in."

"I don't wanna do that and you don't want me to do that. If I come in here it ain't gonna end well." Deacon clenched his jaw.

"Rayna wants you to come in and talk. I don't like it anymore than you do. We both know that we don't have a choice in the matter though. What she wants she gets. I don't think I have to tell you that." Teddy opened the door wider to allow his entry.

"I think I know that even better than you do." Deacon reluctantly walked into the suite. He didn't want to give in, but even with as pissed off as he was with her, he still couldn't refuse her anything she asked of him.

"I guess you do." Teddy offered lamely.

"Yep," Deacon looked around the suite, so he didn't have to look at the other man holding his child like he had a right to her.

Thankfully, Rayna didn't keep them waiting long. She walked out fresh from her daily routine. "There's my girl." She took Maddie into her arms. "Did you have a fun time with Uncle Deacon last night and this morning?" She kissed her cheek.

Deacon's face fell. That was a complete one-eighty from the tune she had taken earlier in his room. The face she put on around Teddy was up now. It wasn't someone he knew or particularly liked.

Teddy shot a smug look in Deacon's direction. "It's good to have both my girls under one roof again."

Deacon dug his nails into his palms so hard that half moon impressions were left in the skin.

Rayna step Maddie up with some toys in the middle of the floor and let her play. "Ok. She's occupied, I think it's time to have the talk I wanted you to come in for, Deacon."

"I'm here and willin' to talk." Deacon retorted.

"We have to figure out what to do and how to handle this situation in a way that is best for this little girl." Rayna didn't know what else to say.

"I'm more than willin' to do that. You know how much she meant to me even before I found out she's mine." Deacon could agree to that with no problem. Doing what was best for Maddie was first and foremost on his mind.

"I think the best thing for Maddie is to keep things the way she's used to them. We can tell her the truth when she's older. Right now she needs an uncomplicated childhood in a stable home. Rayna and I can provide that for her. Deacon, you're not in a position to do that and you never have been. I think we all know that for a fact." Teddy spoke up. Of course, he would advocate for that course of action.

Deacon bit the inside of his cheek so hard the metallic taste of blood filled his mouth. He had to do that to keep from putting his fist through Teddy's face. "Now, just wait a damn minute. That ain't gonna happen. This is my daughter and I ain't just gonna walk away and let you raise her. It was one thing when I didn't know, but now that I know I wanna spend every minute with her that I can. You don't get a damn say in this at all. This is between the two people who made her and you ain't one of 'em. Rayna and I get to decide what goes one with her. You can stand there and shut the fuck up. I put up with you for Rayna's sake I ain't even inclined to do that anymore." The slim hold he had on his temper started to slip. His ears, neck, and face turned an angry shade of red.

Rayna stepped in between the two men to keep them from coming to blows. "Ok, that is enough. Both of you calm the fuck down. I'm not gonna have this go on in front of my baby girl. As far as I'm concerned she belongs to me more than she belongs to either of you. If either of you test me I promise you that I will take my daughter and you'll play hell seein' her. I don't wanna do that, but I will if you can't behave like adults." It was an empty threat and she knew it. At least it was where Deacon was concerned. He would normally go along with anything she wanted if wasn't something he was passionate about. Maddie for sure fell into the category of things he was passionate about. It was the only piece of Rayna he had left. She knew he would fight her tooth and nail for the baby they had made together.

"I want my time with my daughter. I want her to know I'm her daddy and I want to be the only man she calls that. He don't get some award or pat on the back 'cause he stepped in and took somethin' that wasn't his to begin with. As far as I'm concerned he's a thief and you both committed fraud the minute you had him sign that birth certificate knowin' that she was really mine." Deacon laid down the law.

"That can be arranged." Rayna agreed with him. More than anything she wanted him to be a huge present part in Maddie's life. It was all she'd wanted since the moment she found out she was pregnant. In hind sight she should have told Deacon about the baby the minute the stick turned blue. She shouldn't have allowed herself to be talked out of it by Tandy and Teddy. It made her sick to her stomach when she thought about all the things with Maddie she'd robbed Deacon of by not telling him about her.

Teddy silently fumed. His muscles stiffened and his face got red. "I'm her daddy and I'm the only man she knows in that role. It's not fair to her or to me to take that away now. You should have thought about this when you told me you wanted me to be her father no matter what the test said."

Rayna whipped around and glared at him, her red hair bouncing with the movement of her head. She would deal with him in private. "Deacon, I will have some papers drawn up for you to sign regardin' Maddie. I'm promise you that I'm not gonna screw you over. I want our daughter to have a relationship with her daddy. Right now, I need you to take her and spend some more time with her while I talk some things over with Teddy. I will meet you at the buses when it's time to go."

Deacon smiled, he couldn't help, but notice she let herself slip into her drawl because she was around him. He was more pissed at her than he'd ever been in his life, but he still wanted her. He hated to break it to Teddy, but he didn't stand a prayer for a hope when it came to winning her over. Rayna didn't know it yet, but she was already on her way back to him. "I'd love that." He scooped Maddie up in his arms and kissed her cheek. "Come on, munchkin. You and daddy are gonna spend some more time together before we get on the buses and go bye-bye." He collected her diaper bag and left the room.

"What the hell was that, Rayna?" Teddy demanded once Deacon was gone.

"That was me doing what's best for my daughter. You were the one who forced my hand in this. I didn't do this 'cause I just woke up and decided I wanted to. I told him 'cause I couldn't risk y'all coming to blows if you told him." Rayna sighed loudly.

Teddy knew exactly what he had wanted to happen and things didn't seem to be going that way. He wanted her to actually fall in love with him, because out of love for her he had let her tell the man she'd loved for most of her life that they had a baby together. He had expected her to fall into his arms and tell him how much she loved him and never wanted to be without him. His intentions hadn't been pure at all. They had been selfish and manipulative. "That's bullshit, Rayna, and we both know it. It was only a matter of time before you broke down and told him. At least this way I got some sort of say in when it happened. I don't know why you are just going to let her be alone with him and let him turn her life upside down."

"I know that I made a horrible decision where Deacon and Maddie were concerned, but that doesn't mean I'm some monster who would tell him about his daughter and then not let him have anything to do with her. I can get him to go along with most of what I want him to do, but not where she is concerned. He will fight me to be in her life and quite frankly I have to be careful here or I could lose her. I don't think he would do that to me, but I did it to him and he's a wounded animal right now. I know better than anyone what he's like when he gets like this. He will burn everything to the ground before he knows what he's done." Rayna retorted.

"And you let Maddie go off alone with him. I don't know why you thought that would be a good idea." Teddy seethed.

"Knowin' what I know 'bout him. She is the one person I have to worry about him doing anything to hurt. You helped create this mess and I'm doing the best I can to fix it." Rayna glared at him.

"Which mess? The part where we both agreed to keep Maddie's paternity a secret or the part where I got tired of waiting for this situation to blow up and decided to do something about it?' Teddy demanded.

"Teddy, I don't wanna fight with you right now or ever for that matter. I have two weeks left on this leg of the tour and things to work out with Deacon. Right now I need you to go. If you're waved in front of his face like a red flag it is only gonna end is disaster. Let me fix this and we will talk when I get home." Rayna laid down the law.

"Fine, whatever you want. We will do this your way." Teddy agreed. It wasn't like he could say much to fight with her.

* * *

"Alright, Maddie, let's get you on your bus then daddy has to get on his bus." Deacon was balancing her and the diaper bag on one arm and he had his guitar in his other hand.

Maddie put her hands on his cheeks and kissed his nose with a huge grin.

Deacon broke out in a face splitting smile. "I love you and I'm gonna miss you so damn much."

"Hey, Deac, how are things goin' with your little girlfriend there?" Crawford the bass guitarist teased him.

"Maddie, tell Uncle Crawford to leave us alone." Deacon rolled his eyes.

"Deac, you can't wait 'round for her to grow up and date ya 'cause you blew it with her momma." Billy the drummer chimed in.

"You're lucky that I'm holdin' this baby right now or I would sock you one right in the mouth for sayin' that shit." Deacon glowered at him.

"Deacon John, watch your language in front of that baby. I don't want her goin' to preschool and lettin' loose with a string of four letter words she learned from her daddy." Rayna breezed into the midst of her band.

Deacon's jaw dropped. He couldn't believe she'd just said that so matter of fact. He was sure that she was going to make him keep quiet about it for as long as possible. "Ray, you know what you said?"

"I said what I said. You're her daddy I'm sure that they've all discussed the possibility amongst themselves. That bein' said if I hear a damn thing 'bout it I will fire whoever the hell decided to open their big ass mouth." Rayna took Maddie from his arms. "Hi, princess, come to momma. I hope you had a good time with daddy today."

"Momma!" Maddie squealed and clapped her hands.

"You sure are excited to see me. What did your daddy do to you?" Rayna kissed both her cheeks wetly.

"Boss Lady, it's Deac, he shouldn't be trusted with a house plant. You might wanna check and make sure that her diaper ain't duck taped on." Hayes the fiddle player joked.

Deacon went to make sure his stuff was in order on the other bus while Rayna took a minute with getting ready to leave.

"Don't joke about that. It's a very real possibility with Deacon. He is a Mississippi redneck, I put nothin' past him." Rayna snorted and rolled her eyes.

Deacon looked around confused and scratched his head. "Where the fuck is my stuff?"

"It's bein' loaded onto my bus, potty mouth. You're with me and Maddie. I don't want her on that bus with you and those clowns in the band. We should both have equal time with her and this works out well." Rayna told him. She took matters into her own hands without asking him what he wanted to do on the matter.

"Ok, whatever you want. I just wanna make this easier on Maddie." The look on Deacon's face betrayed his feelings.

Rayna grabbed him by his elbow and pulled him aside. "I know that cooped up on a bus with me is the last place you wanna be right now and I don't blame ya. But, this is for our daughter, so she can have both her parents with her at least for a little while."

Deacon shrugged his shoulders. "There ain't a thing I wouldn't do for this baby girl or for you regardless of what I just found out you lied to me 'bout. If you want me on that bus I'm there, but it's for Maddie. I don't know that I will ever be able to forgive you."

Rayna felt like a knife had been driven into her heart at his words. "If that's how you feel you have every right to feel that way I can't imagine how it feels to be in your shoes right now. I wouldn't want to know. I'm sorry for the hurt I know I've caused you, but we have to find a way to raise this little girl up together."

"It is how I feel. The funny thing is as much as I hurt right now and as pissed off as I am at you I wouldn't want you to feel an ounce of the hurt I feel right now. I still love too damn much to want you to ever be hurt. I regret that this damn disease I have ever caused me to hurt you. It hurts me to have to live with the fact that I hurt you in any way." Deacon took a deep breath.

"Deac," Rayna said almost plaintively.

"I know. We've made a mess of things and now we gotta sort it out. I will get on that bus with you and Maddie and we will be a family at least for a little while. I said I don't know if I'll ever forgive ya and I know that's a lie. I'd do anythin' just to see ya smile." Deacon replied.

"I think that's all I can ask for." Rayna gave him a watery smile. She got on the bus before he could see her cry.

* * *

Rayna walked up and down the floor of her bus with a screaming Maddie in her arms. "Shh, it's ok, baby girl. Momma's got you. I know that you don't wanna go down, but it's your nap time."

Deacon looked up from the song he was working on. "Do you want me to give it a try?"

"I would love for you to give it a try nothin' that I try to do with her is workin'." Rayna happily handed her over to him.

They had been on the same bus with each other for five days and so far they had avoided talking about any of the issues between them.

"Maddie, let daddy try this song out on you. Maybe you will like it better than I do." Deacon sat her next to him and picked up his guitar. He started to pick out a tune.

Rayna opened a bottle of water and sat down in the booth by the kitchen.

"_You should know there will be days when you pray for sun and get the rain. When the tears fall down your pretty face my love will blow the storm away. In the middle of a sleepless night when your dreams are puttin' up a fight. When the words I say don't come out right. I'm still gonna be right by your side." _He sang to her softly.

Maddie rubbed her eyes, but all her attention was focused on him.

"_Life is full of ups and downs. And I can't change the world around. The only thing that I can do is always keep on lovin' you." _Deacon smiled down at her. He had been writing this song for her. She was the center of his world now. He didn't stop to think that she wasn't the only woman in his life the song applied to.

Rayna sat up and she too was hanging on to every word he sang.

"_The world ain't always shiny gold and happiness is hard to hold. But, as our story's bein' told my love for you it don't get old."_ He hadn't been thinking when he'd written that verse, but it applied to him and Rayna.

Maddie relaxed back into the couch and she started to drift off to sleep to the soothing sound of his voice.

"_Yes, life is full of ups and downs and I can't change the world around. The only thing that I can do is anythin' you want me to.." _

Rayna looked down at the bottle of water she held between her hands. She regretted more than anything giving up on him. She wished she would have known that the fifth time in rehab was going to stick and they could be a family.

"_The only thing that I can do is always keep on lovin' you." _He finished the song softly. He smiled when he saw that Maddie was fast asleep next to him.

Rayna had to wipe the tears away from her eyes. The pure love that he had for their daughter took her breath away. It was unlike anything she had ever experienced before. She cleared her throat to get her emotions under control. "Well, it looks like you have the touch when it comes to her."

"She is putty in her daddy's hands." Deacon replied.

"I can see that. She is so in love with you that it isn't funny. She always has been. I think she knew you were her daddy before I told her." Rayna mused.

"I'm so in love with her." Deacon stared down at Maddie.

"You are so good with her." Rayna didn't really know what else to say.

Deacon bent over and kissed his daughter's head. "Do you want me to move her to a bed?"

"No, let her get into a sound sleep. She will wake right up if you don't." Rayna replied. "That song was somethin' else."

"Yeah, I started writin' it when I found out that Maddie is mine. I didn't like the way it sounded, but seein' how it put her to sleep so easily I think I need to leave it just the way it is." Deacon mused.

"I think it's great. I think that about all the songs you write though. Deacon, we really need to talk." Rayna thought it was time to talk about it.

"Rayna, I don't wanna talk 'bout it yet. Anythin' I say is only gonna come from a place of anger. I need to talk to you when I'm calmer and when I don't feel like I'm gonna put my fist through a wall." Deacon retorted hotly.

"That's nothin' new you have never been able to control your temper. This wouldn't be the first time that we talked when you're pissed the fuck off." Rayna didn't know why she was picking a fight with him, but it seemed like the things to do.

"You get like this when you don't get your damn way. I guess part of that is my fault. I always went out of my way to make sure you got whatever the fuck you wanted. You didn't share the same sentiments when it came to me. You decided that you'd just give my daughter to another man and then tell me when you thought I should know and not before then. If I've ever earned the right to be pissed the fuck off now is the time. Don't go actin' like you didn't do anythin' wrong. You did a lot wrong. I know I did wrong, but I didn't do anythin' near as bad as what you did. If you can't live with that. It's on you not on me." Deacon raged at her.

"You are unbelievable sometimes. You can't get over yourself long enough to talk to me 'bout somethin' that is very important for us when it comes to our daughter." Rayna yelled back at him.

"I see some things never change, Ray. When you don't get your way you get down right pissy." Deacon slammed back.

"I'm not gonna do this with you." Rayna stalked off to her room and slammed the door shut. She closed her eyes tightly and sighed. Something about that argument just felt right. There was never that kind of passion or heat when she fought with Teddy. It was everything that she had been missing since she had married him and left Deacon behind.

* * *

A/N: Here is the next chapter. I hope you guys enjoyed it. Until next time please review.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thanks to all my reviewers.

* * *

Chapter 3

Maddie screamed at the top of her lungs like her poor little heart was breaking. Rayna walked the floor of her hotel room with her in her arms and bounced her gently. She was at the end of her rope with the little girl. She just didn't know what else to do for her. She had expended everything in her bag of tricks. With that in mind she grabbed her diaper bag and the key to the room.

She walked down the hall and knocked on Deacon's door. She said a silent prayer under her breath that he didn't have some groupie in his bed.

Deacon opened the door his hair askew from sleep. He rubbed his eyes. "Ray, what's goin' on? It's one in the mornin'."

"Your daughter won't sleep for love or money. I think that there is somethin' wrong with her." Rayna was clearly frazzled.

Deacon took Maddie into his arms and held her against his chest. "Come on in while we figure out what to do 'bout this little one." He walked back into the room and started flipping lights on.

Maddie was now reduced to hiccupping sobs.

"Deacon, somethin' just ain't right. She only cries like this when she's hurt or not feelin' well. Normally though just holdin' her and talkin' to her helps." Rayna ran her hand through her hair.

"Maddie, can you show daddy where it hurts?" Deacon rubbed her back soothingly. He felt her forehead. "Ray, she is burnin' up." He looked at her in alarm.

Maddie just whined plaintively in his arms.

"It could be from all the cryin' she's been doin'. Let me get the thermometer and see what's goin' on." Rayna dug through Maddie's bag for the thermometer.

"Ok, Maddie, we are gonna let your momma take your temperature and daddy is just gonna sit here and hold you." Deacon perched himself on the edge of the bed.

Rayna put the thermometer in her ear. "It's ok, baby girl, momma and daddy are both right here."

Maddie tried to jerk away from her. She wailed loudly.

"Hey, hey, it's alright." Deacon shushed her.

Rayna checked the thermometer when it beeped. "Deacon, she has a fever of almost one hundred and two."

"From the way she's actin' I think she may have an ear infection. She's pullin' on her ear." Deacon looked up at her. "What do we do?"

"We are gonna be home tomorrow and I can take her to her regular doctor then. I much rather not have to take her to the emergency room here." Rayna chewed on her bottom lip nervously.

"I think I know just the thing to do. Does she have any Tylenol in her bag?" Deacon stood up and walked to the bathroom.

"Of course, she does. What kinda mother would I be if I didn't come prepared?" Rayna got the Tylenol out.

Deacon returned with rubbing alcohol and a cotton ball. "I know you're a good momma, Ray. I would never say otherwise. I just asked a question. If not I was gonna run out and get some for her."

Rayna took a deep breath to calm herself. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have bitten your head off. I know that you're only tryin' to be a good daddy."

"It's alright, Ray." Deacon reassured her.

"What are you gonna do with the alcohol?" Rayna got back to the topic at hand.

"I'm gonna pour it in her ear to help her be more comfortable. My momma used to do this for me when we didn't have money for the doctor. I figure it'll hold her over 'til she can see her doctor. Do you wanna hold her or have her mad at you for pourin' alcohol in her ear?" Deacon explained himself to her.

"Since you know what you're doin', I'll let you do it and I'll hold her." Rayna took Maddie and sat on the bed with her.

"Tilt her head over for me." Deacon poured some alcohol into the cap for the bottle.

Rayna tilted Maddie's head to the side.

Maddie fussed and squirmed.

"I know, baby girl, momma and daddy are bein' so mean to you right now." Rayna held her steady.

"Daddy is just tryin' to help his baby." Deacon poured the alcohol in her ear and put the cotton ball in. He gave her the Tylenol while she was already mad at him.

"There you go, all done. Daddy got you fixed up." Rayna stopped holding her so tightly.

Deacon held out his hands to her and wiggled his fingers. "Come see daddy again."

Maddie shook her head and then buried her face in Rayna's chest stubbornly.

"Well, I'll say this that little girl is a stubborn thing just like her momma." Deacon chuckled.

"She gets that stubborn shit from her daddy." Rayna gave him a small smile. "Madison Miranda, go to your daddy. He wasn't bein' mean to you he was just tryin' to help you 'cause he loves you so much. He plays guitar for you and sings to you so you can have a good nap."

"Sing," Maddie babbled. She held her arms out for Deacon to pick her up.

Deacon picked her up and laid down in bed with her. He hummed softly and started to sing while he played with her hair.

Rayna watched the two of them and she couldn't help melting a little bit. "If you've got her I'm just gonna go back to my room."

Deacon shook his head and patted the bed on the other side of Maddie. "Stay. Our baby is sick and she needs both her parents right now. We have to learn to co parent and do things we rather not do for her."

Rayna nodded her head and got into the bed with them. She took one of Maddie's little hands in her own and rubbed the back of it with her thumb. "This child is gonna be the death of me. I never knew true fear 'til I had her."

"I know. She makes me feel like wrappin' her up in my arms and keepin' her there where nothin' bad can ever hurt her." Deacon replied.

Maddie let out a low whine.

Rayna started to sing one of their old songs.

Deacon came in at his part.

It didn't take long before Maddie was sound asleep between them.

"She looks so much like you when she sleeps." Rayna whispered.

"I only see you when I look at her. I have a time believin' that I had anythin' to do with helpin' to make someone so perfect." Deacon stared at his daughter in what could only be described as reverence.

Rayna put her hand on top of his on Maddie's little belly. "You are such a good daddy and I'm sorry that I took the chance for you to show me that sooner away from you. I know that you hate me right now, well I hate me too and I'm absolutely sick over all the things I took away from you and her."

"I don't hate you, Ray. I could never hate you. I just hate what you did. I missed so much time with her that I can never get back. I never thought that I'd have the chance to be a daddy and now that I have it I missed out on a big part of it. I mean I know I still have so many things I can do with her and to look forward to, but still I missed some pretty big stuff. I wasn't the first and only man she will ever call daddy, I didn't get to feed her a bottle or walk the floor with her at night when she was fussy, I didn't get to lay on the floor and encourage her to crawl or put her on the tops of my feet to show her how to walk. I didn't get to hear her first words. That's a lot of important things that I didn't get to be there for." Deacon was careful to keep his voice low. He didn't want to wake Maddie and have her start crying again.

Rayna squeezed his hand in a comforting gesture. "You're right and I don't know what else to say to that. You are gonna bear the brunt of it more than Maddie. She will never realize that she called anyone other than you daddy. I have to live with this to. I have to look at the two people I love more than anythin' in this world and deal with the guilt of what I did to them."

Deacon looked at her quizzically. "You still love me?"

"Of course, I still love you. You were my first love and you will always have a huge piece of my heart. You are the man who made me a momma. All the bad things that we've done to each other aside I love you for that alone." Rayna cupped his cheek gently.

"What does that mean for us?" Deacon brushed a stand of hair behind her ear. It was a gesture that spoke to the high level of intimacy between the two of them.

Rayna bit her bottom lip. She knew how she wanted to answer that question. She wanted to throw all caution to the wind. She wanted to run away with the man she loved and their daughter and never look back. To hell with what that would do to her image. She could get a quick, quiet divorce and then settle into a new life with her family. She was scared though. The reasons she hadn't told him about Maddie were still valid. He was still an alcoholic even if he was in recovery. He'd still managed to hurt her worse than anyone in her life ever had except maybe her father. She couldn't do that to Teddy either. He was a decent man he had stepped up to do the noble thing when she was scared, pregnant, and alone. He had been a great father to Maddie and he was a good husband she just didn't feel the spark of passion with him that she did with Deacon. She kept expecting it to come in time, but it hadn't yet and it likely never would.

Her conflicting emotions warred across her face. Her brows knitted together like they did when she was thinking on something intensely. Her shoulders stiffened up and the tension in her body was almost tangible.

Deacon studied her face closely and he could see just how confused and scared she was. They had always been able to read each other and know what the other was thinking without it being verbalized. It was part of what made their relationship so special. They had a connection that went deeper than physical attraction and things they had in common. They were connected on what could only be described as a spiritual connection. Like their relationship had been ordained by God at the beginning of time. If he had to swear on a stack of Holy Bibles he would say that he was certain he had loved her in this lifetime and any other that they had ever lived. The love he felt for her was too deep and too intense to have been something that happened by chance. A love like that had to be fated.

He stared deeply into her eyes and gently brushed her cheek with his knuckle. He smiled softly at her. "It's ok, you don't have to answer right now. I know that you're scared. I put you through hell you have every right to be. I also know that you're married. You took vows and I know you well enough to know that means somethin' to you even if it is just a need you feel to live up to an obligation. I will just say this that ain't no way for you to live your life. I ain't in a place to be with you right now, 'cause I'm so pissed off at you, but that will fade in time."

She licked her lips and cleared her throat. "Right now we will just focus on Maddie she's is the most important person in both our lives. If we can agree to nothin' else we can agree on that." She started to sit up. "I should go and leave her here to rest with you."

"Ray, stay. This way just this once she can have her momma and daddy both with her. We owe her that much. We gotta do this together. Our little girl is sick she deserves to have us both tonight." He pleaded with her with his eyes.

She nodded her head quickly and laid back down. She hadn't really wanted to leave anyway. Being in his bed again just felt right. "You're right I'll stay."

He laughed softly. "I should check and make sure you ain't sick. You just told me I was right twice in the last ten minutes."

"I would argue with you, but I'm too tired to." She yawned. Her nose wrinkled up.

He smiled at her. Maddie looked just like her when she yawned. "Get some rest. I've got Maddie if she wakes up during the night."

"Thank you," Rayna closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Teddy smiled at the nurse who let him into the exam room where Rayna was with Maddie. He'd been worried sick ever since he got the call from Rayna to meet her at the doctor's office, because their daughter was sick.

"The doctor will be in shortly, Mr. Conrad." The nurse smiled back at him and closed the door.

The smile fell from Teddy's face when he saw that Deacon was already in the room with his wife and daughter. This was not going at all the way he'd planned it. "What's he doing here?" He demanded.

"My daughter is sick I ain't gonna be anywhere else in the world right now. She ran a fever and I was up with her all night. I wanna hear everythin' that's goin' on with her." Deacon replied tightly. He sat on the exam table with Maddie in his arms.

"Teddy, now is not the time for this. We are going to discuss this at home and then Deacon is gonna come by later and we are all gonna talk like rational adults. I don't care if either of you like that or not." Rayna warned him. She shot a glare at Deacon that told him to keep his mouth shut.

"Whatever you say." Teddy rolled his eyes.

"Sure thing, Ray." Deacon bounced Maddie on his knee to keep her occupied.

"Dada, dada," Maddie babbled and reached out to Teddy.

A smug smirk lit Teddy's face and he took Maddie into his arms. He was more than a little happy about the hurt look in Deacon's eyes. He kissed Maddie's cheeks. "Hi, princess, daddy missed you so much."

"You ain't her daddy I am." Deacon mumbled. He looked down because he didn't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing the tears that filled his eyes.

Rayna put a comforting hand on his shoulder and she shot Teddy a reproachful look for rubbing that in his face. "It's ok, it'll just take some time to get her used to callin' you daddy."

"He's not daddy, he's Uncle Deacon." Teddy shot back.

"Teddy, I said that now isn't the time for this." Rayna spoke through clenched teeth. If he was going to behave this way it was going to make her decision that much easier.

Before Teddy had a chance to reply Maddie's doctor walked in the room. Dr. Morris consulted the chart and he turned to smile. "What seems to be going on with Maddie today?" He asked.

Rayna took Maddie from Teddy and handed her back to Deacon. "I think she may have an ear infection. She had a fever all night and she was pullin' on her ear." She explained to him.

Dr. Morris looked confused by Deacon's presence. "It seems we have a visitor in the room."

"This is Maddie's father, Deacon Claybourne. He wanted to be here and get up to speed about Maddie's health." Rayna informed him.

"Do I need to change the name on her chart?" Dr. Morris asked.

"Yes,", "No," Deacon and Teddy spoke at the same time.

Dr. Morris cleared his throat to ease the tension. "If you need me to I can run a DNA test. I can be very discreet." He offered. He wasn't sure of the situation he just knew that it seemed very hostile between Teddy and Deacon.

"We've already had one done. We know that Deacon is her father. Let's just put that on the back burner for now. I really think that we should just focus on Maddie for right now." Rayna rubbed her temples.

Deacon bounced Maddie up and down on his knee again. She was starting to get very fussy. "If you could check her out that would be great."

"Maybe you shouldn't boss the doctor around like you're uncivilized." Teddy grumbled.

Rayna took a deep breath to keep from killing her husband.

Dr. Morris sanitized his hands and stooped down to Maddie's level. "Hey, Maddie, what's going on with you?"

Maddie fussed and buried her face in Deacon's chest.

Dr. Morris put her stethoscope to her chest and listened to her lungs. He looked into her nose and ears before he straightened up. "She for sure has an ear infection, but her lungs and everything sound good."

"What do we do for that?" Deacon asked.

"I'm gonna proscribe some antibiotics and eardrops." Dr. Morris answered.

"Ok, that sounds good. Is there anythin' else we need to be doing?" Rayna asked.

"Just let her lay around and give her plenty of TLC. Make sure she had plenty of fluids. You know the drill." Dr. Morris replied.

"Alright, let's get her home then." Rayna smiled tightly.

* * *

From the doctor's office Deacon went to meet up with his sponsor. With everything that had been going on he hadn't really had a chance to take stock of things and just take it all in. He sat in a corner booth at a coffee house. His hand was wrapped around a mug of coffee and was staring down into it lost in thought.

Coleman walked into the coffee shop and slid into the booth across from Deacon. "Looking for the meaning of life?"

Deacon looked up at him his eyes full of pain. "Did you know?"

"Did I know what?" Coleman's face was a mask of confusion.

"That Rayna's little girl is mine?" Deacon's tone was accusatory.

Coleman nodded. "I knew. I didn't tell her not to tell you, but I did tell her if she wanted you to really make rehab work that she had to let you go. It was either let you go or watch you drink yourself to death."

"That wasn't your damn call to make, Cole. You're supposed to be my sponsor. You're supposed to do what is in my best interests not what you think it is. You had no right to go behind my back and tell the woman I love to break up with me. I woulda found a way to make it work the last time. It wasn't that I didn't have Rayna waitin' on me it was 'cause I found a program that worked. 'Cause of that little let him go speech I missed out on two years with my daughter. I didn't get to have with her what you had with your daughter. You had no right." Deacon shook his head agitatedly.

"Deacon, I did what I thought was gonna keep you alive. The way you were drinking only ended with her finding you dead on the floor. I didn't want you to die. I won't apologize for that." Coleman retorted.

"I trusted you. I told you things that I would have rather crawled across broken glass than tell anyone. I still spill all my secrets to you. I don't know how I'm ever gonna do that again. Ray I kinda get why she did what she did. She was scared and alone and probably had everyone tellin' her that I was no good for Maddie. For once in her life she listened 'cause she was in vulnerable place. You, I don't understand at all. You let me cry on your shoulder 'bout how difficult a time I was havin' seein' her move on and have a baby with another man. At any time you coulda ended that and given me more time with my daughter 'fore she got attached to another man." Deacon seethed.

"Deacon, I don't know what you want me to say." Coleman searched for the right words. Seeing the pain Deacon was in told him that he had done exactly the wrong thing.

"I don't want you to say anythin' we're done here. I don't wanna see you again for awhile." Deacon got up and walked out.

* * *

Rayna opened the door after the first knock. "Hey, Deacon, come on in."

"How's Maddie doin'?" Deacon walked in without acknowledging her.

"She doin' much better. Teddy's just puttin' her down in the nursery. She's been in and outta it since we left the doctor's office." Rayna answered him.

Deacon grunted at that. "I wanna see her."

"If you go in there she's gonna get all keyed up. You know what she gets like when she sees you. You're in a mood, you wanna tell me why?" Rayna could see the tension in his shoulders.

"You let my sponsor tell you to walk away from me and not tell me 'bout my daughter. That's why I'm in a mood as you called it." Deacon frowned.

"Deacon, I regret listenin' to him more than anythin'." Rayna was sincere in her statement.

"You didn't have to. I know that you were scared and alone, but you still coulda told me." Deacon crossed his arms over his chest.

"What was I supposed to do? I had everyone else in my ear tellin' me that she would be better off without you in her life. I thought 'bout it I really did. The minute I found out for sure that you were her father I wanted to end this whole charade. But, Teddy made me promise that I would never tell you. I felt obligated after everythin' that he'd done." Rayna replied.

"I always knew that you don't feel about me the way I feel about you. I never knew that you basically feel nothing." Teddy said softly. He'd walked into the room just in time to hear that.

"Teddy, you had to know what this was when we agreed to do it. We have this life that we built together, but it doesn't feel like mine. I don't know who I am anymore. The only thing I know for sure is I love bein' Maddie's momma. That's the only part of this that doesn't feel wrong." Rayna groaned.

Deacon hid a smirk behind his hand. "I don't think this has anythin' to do with me. I'm gonna go sit with my daughter while you sort this out." He excused himself.

"Rayna, what does this mean? What do you want from me?" Teddy asked.

"I want some time and some space, Teddy. That's what's best for me and for Maddie. I go back on the road in a couple weeks until then I would like for you to leave. I need to figure things out. I don't know what's gonna happen, but I know I can't even see the answer with you breathin' down my neck." Rayna told him.

"I'll get my stuff and leave then. I think we both know that I won't be back and you're gonna go crawling right back to him. Only this time when he let's you down you won't have me there to pick you back up. I would still like to see Maddie." Teddy replied.

Rayna looked unsure. "I'm not gonna cut you outta her life completely, but I have to tread carefully. If we aren't together then there's really no reason for you to be in her life. We aren't to that point yet, but if you're so sure we're doomed then it's somethin' we need to think 'bout. I will leave that ball in your court."

"I'm gonna go pack." Teddy shook his head and walked away.

Rayna found Deacon in Maddie's room in the rocker. He was staring down at her in her crib with nothing, but love in his eyes.

"How much of that did you hear?" She asked him softly.

"I heard enough. You didn't have to do that on my account." He whispered.

"I didn't do that for you. I did that for me and her. It's not fair to her to continue to live this lie and it's not fair to me to live this unfulfilled life." She told him.

"Good for you. You need to do what's best for you and for her. I won't put you on that spot by askin' what part I play in all that." He replied.

"You are always gonna be in my life one way or another. And you're damn sure gonna be there for our daughter. I think the rest we will figure out as it comes. I need time and you need time. I don't wanna rush into somethin' else." Rayna spoke gently.

"That sounds like a good idea. I need you to know that no matter what I'm always gonna love you and I will always be there for you both. I told ya she's the first person I've ever loved more than you. It scares me a little bit. I love you intensely and I feel ten times that for her." Deacon smiled a little.

"I know the feeling. This thing between us has always been so damn intense and the minute I laid eyes on her I felt that and then some. I loved her for bein' her and I loved her 'cause she's part of you. I love that you're her daddy. I love that you made me a momma." Rayna smiled too.

"Have you been happy these last couple years?" He looked up at her intently.

"I've been happy to be her momma, but I haven't been that happy in my personal life." She admitted.

"I'm sorry that I drove you to that. All I've ever wanted is your happiness." He took his part of the blame for the things that had gone down.

"And I'm sorry for what I did to you." She took his hand and squeezed it.

Teddy walked into the room and he snorted in disgust when he saw them holding hands. He knew that he didn't stand a chance no matter what Rayna said. "I want to say bye to Maddie." He walked over to her crib and bent over. He pressed a gentle kiss to her head. "Bye, sweet girl, no matter what I will always love you." He turned around with tears in his eyes and walked out of the room then out of the house.

Rayna let out a loud sigh. "Will you be ok if I leave you alone with her for a few hours?"

"Ray, you already know the answer to that." Deacon told her.

"I just need to get out of here. I need to go talk to my sister. I don't know what else to do right now." Rayna rubbed her temples.

"Go, I will be fine. I have her medicines and I know what to do with her." Deacon assured her.

"Thank you," Rayna smiled gratefully.

"I'm her daddy you don't have to thank me." Deacon told her. She should have known that he would do anything for his two girls.

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A/N: Here is the next chapter. I hope you guys enjoyed it. Until next time please review.


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